Grandma Leaves, Kids Help, Braden Adjusts

May 30th-Another Journal Entry
I cried the day after Grandma left. It was so nice having her here to help out. It's so hard living so far away from her and the rest of my family. Stu woke up super early to bring Grandma to the airport the day after the kindergarten promotion and came home from work early that day and swam with the kids. The pool water was really warm from having the cover on it even though the air outside was cooler. They had a lot of fun swimming. Braden is allowed to take off his brace to swim, so he was excited. He did well, but got tired and got out to rest before the girls were done.

Brittany made salad, the kids set the table, and we had leftovers for dinner tonight. The kids are all really good helpers. Brittany jumps up at the chance to help, especially tonight when Stu got home late. She held Bailey for me when she was hungry, put a pacifier in her mouth, and rocked her so she was quiet until I could feed her. And when I did start feeding Bailey, Brittany poured Braden his milk, jumped up to turn off the timer when food was ready, and did everything I would normally do. She is just so wonderful and will make an excellent mother someday. Bridgette is the designated diaper thrower-awayer. She wants to do it every time.

Today, after Bailey's doctor's appointment, I took the kids to Wendy's for lunch and we ate at a park nearby. Braden could barely fit in a normal swing and didn't want to go very high because he wasn't situated that well enough to feel safe. He was able to swing, though, and I think that made him happy. I just pushed him. I've also given him piggy-back rides every once in awhile because his ankles are sore from walking so differently. There was a group of mentally disabled/handicapped adults at the park while we were there….and we watched them swing on the swings and squeal with joy and do other unusual things that come with being disabled. I explained to the kids how they were disabled and we had a neat conversation about how Heavenly Father loves every one of us the same, and they were given this trial that is lasting their whole earthly lifetime, and when they are resurrected, they will be made whole and be normal again. Braden is only having a trial for a short time compared to them. It was a good conversation and there was a feeling of love for them as we talked about them.

Most of the time, I think we're doing just fine, then there's those moments that I can't handle it anymore probably because I'm so sleep-deprived. It's hard not to be emotional when I'm so tired. I know it's important to nap and I did for a little bit today when I tried to get Bridgette down for a nap....but it's just so hard to do when other things keep popping up that need to be taken care of. Stu is rocking Bailey in the chair and watching the Angels game. Tomorrow is Braden's baseball team party at Gracianos Pizza. He's excited to go. Maybe I'll get a nap tomorrow when Stu is home. Allison plans on coming over tomorrow to help out in whatever way is needed, too. So that will be nice. She has been a big blessing in our lives. And life goes on and we adjust to our situations. It will only get better from here....it has to. That's the one nice thing about going through rough times....you know it will get better.

I just want to thank my mom for helping us SO SO MUCH while she was here. She worked so hard and did so much. I love you, mom, and hope to be a model of the selfless service and sacrifice like you are someday. You are the best mom and I'm so glad to have you as mine!

Braden is doing good. Every once in awhile in an excited voice, he'll tell me something he just did or accomplished while wearing his brace, like he was surprised or happy he could do it. Braden's friends and Primary leaders from church have stopped by to bring presents, ice cream, and candy. It was really sweet of them to do that. It sure helped to boost his spirits having so many people show that they cared about him. I'm so happy that he/we have so many wonderful and supportive friends to make life so much easier! So thank you everyone for your visits, presents, support, and mostly for just loving my son! It has been so hard on me to see him go through this. He has been so positive and much more stronger than me. A couple days ago, he went outside to play with the neighbor kids for the first time, and just did everything that he normally does, like it was no big deal. He played basketball, rode his scooter, etc. Meanwhile, I'm sitting in the front room of our house, watching out the window, ready to pounce on anyone who is mean to him or makes fun of him, and I'm crying tears of concern, debating whether to just call him in and tell him to come home before someone hurts him or let him stay and play, and I decided to let him stay and play. He ended up having fun and no one was mean to him and it was good. I'm so amazed at his courage and strength. My feelings of wanting him to be loved and protected are just so strong, as any mother would feel for their child, that it's hard to not worry. Anyway, I thank all of you who are thinking of him and helping him to adjust. I love you for that.